xkcd Phone

Presented in partnership with Qualcomm, Craigslist, Whirlpool, Hostess, LifeStyles, and the US Chamber of Commerce. Manufactured on equipment which also processes peanuts. Price includes 2-year Knicks contract. Phone may extinguish nearby birthday candles. If phone ships with Siri, return immediately; do not speak to her and ignore any instructions she gives. Do not remove lead casing. Phone may attract/trap insects; this is normal. Volume adjustable (requires root). If you experience sudden tingling, nausea, or vomiting, perform a factory reset immediately. Do not submerge in water; phone will drown. Exterior may be frictionless. Prolonged use can cause mood swings, short-term memory loss, and seizures. Avert eyes while replacing battery. Under certain circumstances, wireless transmitter may control God.

        View original, but ugly, stick figures on xkcd.com
      

✦ ✦ ✦

🤔 WHY DOES THIS EXIST?

Randall Monroe's art is INCREDIBLY BAD. Sometimes the jokes are funny, but their usually just CONFUSING. AI isn't funny enough to fix his jokes, but it can FIX HIS ART.

SOMEBODY had to do SOMETHING about it. Unfortunately, that person is ME...and Nano Banana 2, which is the DA VINCI OF AI.

If you feel as bad for Randall as I do, you would buy one of his books OUT OF PITY.

✦ ✦ ✦

⚖️ Legal Stuff

CC BY-NC 2.5

Original comics are xkcd by Randall Munroe, licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 2.5 License.

This site is a non-commercial, satirical derivative work. All comic concepts, writing, jokes, and ideas belong entirely to Randall Munroe — we only touched the art (specifically, we improved it). We are not affiliated with xkcd in any way. Randall Munroe does not endorse this site, its aesthetic opinions, or the implication that his artwork needed improvement.

xkcd licensing info →